As a fan of Woody Allen’s older films who was really impressed by Match Point, I’m sad to say I really hated Scoop - despite featuring Scarlett Johansen and England, as did Match Point. Therefore, more blame is reserved for Allen.

Melinda and Melinda was two films in one: a comedy and a thriller, each starring the same actress (Radha Mitchell) where much of the fun was the cutting back and forth between the two. Match Point and Scoop could be seen as separate explorations of these two halves, both starring Scarlett Johansen.

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An inspired moment in Shopgirl transpires as Ray Porter (Steve Martin), a much older, independently wealthy businessman, sits on much younger Mirabelle Buttersfield’s (Claire Danes) futon in her humble, one bedroom apartment before one of their first dates. She offers him a glass of of cheap, white, refrigerated wine. Ray takes the glass out of politeness, smirks a bit, and with a pained expression, fumbles over whether or not to drink it. Wordlessly, it’s clear he doesn’t want it, as it’s a beverage far below his usual, refined taste.

Upon seeing this, my alarm bells went off. This guy is a jerk. It’s a glass of free wine, offered by someone who can’t afford better. Either politely say “no thanks, I’m driving,” or suck it up and fake a smile. But it’s a revealing moment, and pretty much sums up the hands-off relationship Ray ensues with Mirabelle - and why their relationship is doomed from the start. He sees her as pitifully beneath him.

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This is the film version of a hit Broadway musical that was based on a Mel Brooks film: an inverted, laughable situation that unfortunately, this film never touches on. The basic gist is that Broadway producers Max Bialystock (Nathan Lane) and Leo Bloom (Matthew Broderick) strive to stage a play so terrible that it’s a guaranteed flop - allowing them to run off with the investor’s money. Could this business model be applied to a Silicon Valley startup? Never mind.

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The fourth (and final) James Bond film to star Pierce Brosnan, sadly, is probably his worst. Die Another Day reminded me of another truly cringe-worthy sequel: Batman And Robin - where Batman went campy and the cartoony characters conversed in cliches based on their names (”have an ‘ice’ day”). Die Another Day is another obscene location for the Cheesecake Factory, serving cheese with cheese on top and cheese on the side, all due to laughably ridiculous situations, comical characters, and so-impressive-they’re-dumb computer special effects, resulting in contender for worst Bond film ever. It’s Moonraker bad.

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It’s not a good sign when you’re part-way into a movie and realize you’ve seen it before, but forgot. I can’t recall exactly where I first saw Tomorrow Never Dies - probably on cable or an airplane ride. Overall, it’s an entertaining flick, but not anything to write home about - and if my experience is any indication - forgettable.

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Moonraker features James Bond (Roger Moore) investigating Hugo Drax (Michael Lonsdale), an evil genius who wants to destroy the world and rule over a new one of his making. He’s developing a nerve gas through his company Drax Industries. The investigation of “why” takes Bond to Venice and Brazil, and eventually into outer space, where Drax has built a space station, from which he plans to deploy his lethal gas onto Earth, killing everyone, and then colonizing the planet anew with his loyal people.

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I’ve read a few Dan Clowes comics (even met him in person) such as Ghost World, Like a Velvet Glove Cast in Iron, and selected issues of Eightball. The first made a neat film, the second is the only comic where I had an out-of-body experience while reading, and the last “Ice Haven” series played with form in a masterful way that comes with years of comic-making experience.

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With Halloween coming up, here’s a horror film I just watched: The Devil’s Rain, starring several famous folks, Tom Skerrit, Ernest Borgnine, Eddie Albert, and the incomparable William Shatner.

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This is a film I thought I would like, but didn’t. It’s an indie-style flick, about two recently-wed urbanite art dealers Madeline and George (Embeth Davidtz and Alessandro Nivola) who travel to the sticks to hang out with George’s family, including his never-graduated from highschool brother Johnny (who thinks George is an asshole) (Ben McKenzie) and his pregnant wife Ashley (Amy Adams).

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Tanja really wanted to see this flick. I read the Dan Millman book Way of the Peaceful Warrior back in the ’90s and vaguely remembered it as some kind of self-motivating-new-agey coming-of-age type thing.

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