= 3 stars

Starring Jackie Earle Haley, Malin Akerman, Jeffrey Dean Morgan
Directed by Zack Snyder

Synopsis

Set in an alternate 1985, a former costumed vigilante named the Comedian is brutally murdered. His former partners, namely the masked psychopath Rorschach, begin an investigation, as the threat of nuclear annihilation hangs over the world.

The Good

• Attention to detail in terms of the set design, costumes, and time period are excellent, truly recreating the comic book art, largely to awesome effect.
• Retains the time-skipping, intertwining plot threads, themes of human nature and justice, and repetition of visual motifs. There are solid origin stories to the Comedian, Dr. Manhattan, and Rorschach, many recurring moments with different significance, and some philosophizing in how Dr. Manhattan’s otherworldly super powers pull him far from humanity. Lastly, there are plenty of happy faces and watches to look for.
• Doesn’t hold back in terms of darkness and violence. The Comedian’s cruelty in Vietnam and toward the original Silk Spectre are crucial to the flawed hero concept, and I remember the comic freaking me out by showing what Rorschach sees in the psychiatrist’s ink blots – both are in the movie.
• Jackie Earle Haley in particular is perfectly psychotic and his reveal from beneath Rorschach’s mask, time in jail, and eventual exit are high points.
• Snyder’s action scenes are visceral and thrilling, and few moments are excellent, like what Rorschach is up to behind a swinging bathroom door.

The Bad

• Synder often wields an inappropriately large “epic” brush. Nearly every scene is introduced with a languid camera move, and slow motion is so overused it literally extends the running time by a psychological extra hour. I also wished many dialogue scenes (Dan and Laurie, Laurie and her mother) were framed more naturally. The end result is a lack of pacing and several important reveals late in the film have limited emotional resonance.
• Popular songs (The Sound Of Silence, 99 Luft Ballons, All Along The Watchtower) are used to poor effect and the last in particular is unintentionally funny.
• Speaking of unintentionally funny, several tolerable aspects of the comic come across as gratuitous or silly: sex in the owl ship (complete with fire ejaculation), Moloch’s pointy ears, Dr. Manhattan’s blue member (why does he sometimes have pants and sometimes not?), and Veidt’s pet tiger with the antennas.
• Too long, despite much that should have been much more entertaining (trip to Mars, nuking a city). There’s a moment where Laurie says to Dr. Manhattan something like: “Why don’t you just tell us what’s going to happen and get it over with already?” My thoughts exactly.

Conclusion

First off, I read the graphic novel, enjoyed it immensely, and was really looking forward to this movie. But I learned a few things about expectations. Beforehand, I thought Snyder’s slavish devotion to the source material and the film’s long running time would both be assets. I was surprised to find both introducing an equal amount of negatives.

Despite a great screenplay, decent casting, and art direction, something failed in the last mile, specifically the editing and soundtrack. I’ve read the graphic novel twice, but don’t think I could handle another viewing of this movie. Even with my familiarity, I still found myself checking my watch several times.

And lastly, I don’t think knowledge of the source material should be required to enjoy a film adaptation. As a result, I lean toward Alan Moore being right. The Watchmen is an often interesting movie,  but I won’t blame anyone if they wait for the rental. And I suggest reading the graphic novel instead.

IMDB: Watchmen
Wikipeida: Watchmen
Rotten Tomatoes: Watchmen 64%

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